“For those of you looking for love this Valentine’s Day, we bring you the ultimate love story. Fred and Gladys, 35 years after they first met, are finally getting hitched. It is a story of romance, betrayal and constitutional high drama.”
“Who on earth are Fred and Gladys?” you might be asking yourself.
***no we’re not actually, but continue.
“Well, those are the not-so-aristocratic nicknames Prince Charles and Camilla Parker Bowles had for each other during their long and tortured romance. Rumor has it that the original plan was to announce the engagement today, Valentine’s Day. It would have been fitting really, since their story does prove that love conquers all.”
***O.k. so how the hell does this tie in to the Transcendence Diaries? glad you asked. (I’m in a conference right now by the way – production meeting – five people total… I am acting like I am taking notes… which I am, sort of, but just not about the actual meeting) I just need to get this out of my system… o.k. … so, uh, yes, on with the nightline drivel:
“It was 35 years ago that they first met, the perfect match: He, the heir to the throne and the most eligible bachelor in the country, and she, from the privileged, upper class. Polo, fox hunting and other common pursuits are what thrust them together.
***is it just me or do you have to read that sentence ten times in order to convince yourself that there are people in the world who are that stupid and inane that “polo, fox hunting, and other common pursuits” are what brought them together?
“They loved each other from the very beginning and everyone knew it. She was exactly the type of woman one might have expected the Prince of Wales to marry, but it was not to be. He joined the Royal Navy and traveled the world. She married someone else.
****o.k. so the chick married someone else and now we who don’t care about these two in the first place, being Americans, are supposed to fall for this love story crap after you just told us that as soon as he joined the navy she married someone else? and this is supposed to be pawned off to the public as a love story? this is the part I really don’t get… why the fuck are we supposed to care about this? why the fuck is nightline trying to pass it off like news?
“Of course we all know the rest.”
***uh, no, we don’t, unless we are idiots who have no actual life of our own…
The lovely and innocent Lady Diana Spencer became the Princess of Wales, the People’s Princess. Camilla was said to have approved the choice. But the marriage of Diana and Charles was fraught from the start and Camilla never disappeared. Diana famously described her marriage to Charles as “rather crowded” since there were three people in it, Camilla being the spare wheel. Just days before that fairy tale wedding back in 1981, Charles had a bracelet made for Camilla engraved with “F” and “G”- the initials of their pet names for each other, “Fred” and “Gladys.”
***what an asshole. I fucking hate people like that. I am tired of the lowly common masses around us using things like country or religion or custom as an excuse for other people to lie or cheat or deceive.. if this guy wanted camile, he should have taken camila in the first place and spared us all the fucking trouble and perhaps almost certainly spared poor Princess diana her life.
“After years of being “the other woman”, “the homewrecker” Camilla Parker Bowles will gain respectability as the wife of the one man she has always loved.
***so much so that she married another man…
“Of course it was not their decision alone. His parents, The Archbishop of Canterbury, the British prime minister, all were involved in the ultimate decision on the nuptials. It is, after all, a constitutional matter.
***as it certainly should be, since it is so goddamned important. my God I am very shocked in fact that our own president is presiding over the wedding itself… this is some life and death shit here…
“Tonight, “Nightline” correspondent Dave Marash reports from London on this royal romance, on the theories as to the timing of the announcement and why the British Royals still are so fascinating to so many of us.
***insert vomiting noises here***
“Ted Koppel anchors tonight as we have a little fun on this Valentine’s Day. We hope you’ll join us.”
***if this is your idea of fun, God help us all…
—–Original Message—– From: Zeke Ziskin [mailto:.com] Sent: Monday, February 14, 2005 6:49 PM To: ‘fishy’ Subject: Diaries
Was perusing through your diaries, and just had to comment on a post you made talking about how much you’re into hip-hop/R&B/urban music. It’s so funny, because that’s exactly where I’m at as well. Rock feels positively dead to me, and all the interesting stuff being done these days is in black music. In fact, I’m desperately figuring out how to adapt the new songs I’m recording to incorporate more of these influences, and less of the rock elements, which is so tired to me. But like you, there’s the feeling that I can only escape my “whiteness” so much, which if you’re like me, is proving frustrating.
In other news, what happened with the NIC DVD?
Dude you are sooooo right! black music is just killing me right now… knocking me out. its so creative and has it all going on… so refreshing as an artist no? and rock bands… God I hope I never have to make another plain old rock/pop album again… yes its hard my brother….
I used to look at Justin Timberlake like… well, like all white rock guys look at him probably… but after I bought his album… I dug it… I just really got it… and really understood where he is trying to come from… he’s doing it pretty well.. he’s got a good team of the best black people behind him and really I think that’s what we would need… because you know, white men can’t jump….
In NIC news… there are several remix guys that want to try doing some remixes up here… but Fred says he cannot get the master DVD to operate properly. so I am trying to get him to send it to you to fix… but he is a fucking STONER. You may never get it. I hate stoners…